Dream Defered?

Ive been talking to my oldest neice alot lately about going back to school. Shes nineteen & I dont want her waisting her life. But she made a very keen observation yesterday that got me thinking alot about my own life path & which direction im moving in. She said You went to school & your still making minimum wage. How could I possibly argue my point because shes right! Ive known people with masters degrees & PHD's that couldnt find work. My position was that education can never be a waste of time because its something youll always have to fall back on. Ive moved from OH to MI to IL. I lived in the big city & tried to make my dreams come true. I went to the best cosmetology school, I have my license in two states & working on a 3rd. I had my own salon in Chicago, small as it was it was still mine. Ive attempted a writing career, singing career & now a career as a stylist & now I am literally back at square one. Its like I dipped my toe in the water, got scared then got it out. I tried but evidently I didnt try hard enough. I was watching a documentary this morning about Selena Gomez, whom I love, even though she is much younger than me & started off in her profession as a child she has soo much ambition & drive & she never stopped, she never gave up. Every time I hit a wall instead of finding a way over under or around it I gave up, walked away & waited to hit the next wall. One of my biggest fears is waisting time. You only live once, you have to get it in now. Im thirty four years old, I came back here to OH to be with my family & for the millionth time I had to rebuild my life. Im already in a pretty ruff financial situation, what if im too old to make another mistake, what if im too broke to take a risk again, what if I hate myself for not trying?