Keep Dreaming

When I was a little girl I Loved Mariah Carey. That was back when MTV was fresh & new & actually played music videos. Whenever one of her videos came on I would grab a hairbrush or remote control, what ever was within reach & resembled a microphone. I would stand there in front of the TV & sing my little heart out. I was just nine or ten years old but I knew one thing for sure, I wanted to sing & I wanted to be famous. I wanted everyone under the sun to know my name, I wanted everyone to love me. Perhaps to compensate for the love that was lacking at home. As we grow, age, mature & evolve so do our dreams & our motivation to pursue them. On one hand you close your eyes & you see glitz & glamour, people snapping pictures of you, fans lining up just to get a glimpse of you or shake your hand. But when you wake up & open your eyes all that's there is hampers of dirty laundry, bills that need to be paid, a job you hate & all the bullshit in between that makes up day to day life. You begin to wonder how on earth am I supposed to get there from here? So you start small, you make little attempts here & there, throw a line in the water so to speak & see if you get any nibbles. But low & behold nothing happens. Now come self doubt & all your insecurities giving you excuse after excuse of why you should just leave these silly childhood fantasies behind & fall back down to reality. Even though your family & friends believe in & support you you don't have any faith in yourself. Fear inevitably follows, not fear that your dreams wont come true but the fear that they possibly could. Because if your dreams come to fruition you have to step up to the plate & deliver, so you begin to question your talent. Am I really good enough? Will everybody love me? I am all to aware of the feelings I just mentioned & a few additional ones. I have been chasing my dreams for the last fourteen years. Music, Fashion, Hair & most recently Writing. I finished writing my first book a few months ago. A week or so before Christmas I sent it off to a dozen literary agents, another line dropped in the water. Today I received my very first rejection letter via email. For a moment I took it personal & got emotional as us women have a tendency to do. But then my best friend put the situation into perspective for me. She said everyone who is the greatest in whatever field they excel in has at one point in their career faced rejection. That made me realize what makes you great is not your talent, its also your ability to make others recognize & see the greatness within you.